Wednesday, June 17, 2009

It's All About Me

Is it just me? Or has the world seemed to get more and more entitled?

Or maybe it always was. But I remember there was some lessons of etiquette somewhere in the recesses of my mind around consideration for others. Like, you don't invite someone who was recently unemployed to join you for dinner at the fanciest restaurant in town.  A whole to-do was made over someone ordering wine and then splitting the bill evenly. You don't ask about someone's fertility, someone's age, and so on. 

I always assumed the logical extensions were that if you ask for something of someone, minimize the request. Don't ask for espresso, ask for coffee. Or water. Not "Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper." When someone is making you dinner, don't request that they make their famous 18-step souffle, particularly on a busy night. 

When someone comes into town, you say "i'd be happy to see you - whenever you have time within these parameters." You don't say "I want to do X, Y, and Z with you at the following times." Maybe that person has a schedule. Maybe they are balancing things. 

You generally don't, for your own self-interest, put someone in the position of having to say no. Am I wrong?

Somehow, I feel like that's been lost. I feel like every single day, I'm forced to say no to family and friends. I'm forced to draw a line that says "This is not your decision." and "You've overstepped your boundary." Maybe it is the company I keep, but I'm sort of shocked. How dare you put me in that position? And not inadvertently- but completely selfishly?

Maybe my previous conversation with the neighbor set me off again on this. Perhaps we should take meeting minutes, and email them to you. Or perhaps you should at least RECOGNIZE that this is an imposition on our time as adults, for which a simple "please, it would be really helpful" might be in order. 

Or maybe I should just get No tattooed on my forehead.


Rachel Ann said...

Entitlement runs rampant. Frreals. I have my theory--it involves colleges.

hornett said...

I agree with Rachel. Colleges and parents tell kids they can do anything and all their dreams will come true - marketing tells them this too. So the backlash of this is that they actually start to believe it!

Anonymous said...

I blame parents. Is there a campaign against permissive parenting?

Kate said...

I swear I didn't hit anonymous. It's clearly not my fault.