Saturday, September 26, 2009

The TV Bubble

I'm getting married in 14 days. This should be the heart of bridezilla season, and indeed, I find I can't sleep a whole night without waking up to some to-do list of another. I miss sleeping in. 

But, other than that, I find it remarkably hard to be a demanding B***h, for one reason that no one seems to tell you: The earth does not stop turning for your wedding.

In the past weeks, tragedy and joy have touched our friends and family - and it feels like the news is coming at a remarkably rapid pace. Or maybe time is just moving faster than usual. Divorce, Engagement, Illness, Loss of Life, Pregnancy, Births, Boyfriends, Girlfriends, New Jobs, Lost Jobs - all seem to be rolling in... It's like an emotional roller coaster of good and bad news. 

I'm not sure how much of this is just normal - but now, with headcount management top-of-mind, every news item has a tangible, Excel spreadsheet implication. I'm sure some of it is exaggerated because we're in more frequent contact with more people with whom we might talk monthly or quarterly. Some people I've never even met. Still, it's a LOT of news.

On TV, or in movies, there is no sub-plot of aunt so-and-so being pregnant. Or a friend who might have to donate bone marrow. Or someone getting sick. Or even work drama in the background. All of that is neatly edited out of the storyline, except for 1-2 interesting, and ultimately resolved, little hitches. Even reality TV works that way.

But reality - minus the TV - is different. How can you fret over flowers when a friend is in tears? How can you scream about it being "your day" when you know it's someone else's birthday? Why would you want to block out the people you love - with whom you chose to celebrate, whether they could make it or not - in their time of need? Or miss an opportunity to share in their joy? 

I'm sure our wedding will be great. I'm also sure it wont be perfect - not because of the appetizers or the photographer or even the weather. It wont be perfect because some of the people we love most can't be there. But, that's true reality. And I'll always pick real life over TV. 

2 comments:

Priya said...

1) Imperfections and unplanned moments make for good stories.

2) There comes a point when you just won't have a plan for a situation, and you'll just have to act. At some point, it probably won't be practical to be consulting that Excel doc, so just decide on the day you 'put it away' and start off-plan operations.

3) It is always sad when people we love don't show up to big events. But you'll be too worried about how badly the fun table is scaring the rest of your family to care. Thats a prediction. Go fun table!

Mr. Le said...

So, I was once told at a job interview that operations meant that you asked and answered the questions before they were ever asked. What the interviewer neglected to mention is that you paralyze yourself in planning for everything. Preparedness also entails 1) accepting and embracing the things that you cannot change; 2) delegating tasks effectively (may I recommend the fun table?); and 3) when it all comes down to it, it's all about keeping the eye on the prize, because in the case at bar, a perfect wedding is one where the betrothed are having a memorable time that they'll share instantaneously with those around them (again, fun table) and vicariously in the stories told for friends many times over.

Looks like you've gotten a headstart!