Monday, January 18, 2010

Not An Adventure

People seem to love a good adventure. A good trek into the madness, trying hard to determine whether the alpaca before you might be hostile or the bread you're eating might be toxic. Or trying desperately to get to the home of a youthful zeus, weaving between one-chicken towns at the request of your flakey GPS. But you know, I'm tired of adventure. 

Is it so wrong that right now, I'd like my recent disastrous attempt at caramelizing sugar be the peak of my current adventures?  (what's the secret, people? it just went from runny to granulated to runny and no browning occurred until I feared for the pot..and gave up)  I can't handle international vacations of intrigue (we have one coming up) or dramatic reconfigurations of life (we have one coming up). I just want to sit peacefully, considering where I can get the perfect new black blazer. Or making my wedding album. Or getting lost in another polygamy book. 

I feel like I can't be home enough these days. I can't cook enough. I can't bake enough. I can't just SIT enough. I feel like I am desperately trying to catch up with myself and convince myself that I'm calm. I'm not that good at self-delusion.

1 comment:

Kate said...

You can always choose not to have those adventures, or postpone one, until you're ready.