Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Public Service Announcement

Today, after sitting on a 2 hour conference call with 50 people... I found out that my phone was NOT MUTED, even though I'd pressed Mute on the phone. WHY? Because apparently the mute function doesn't carry through to 90% of Bluetooth headsets or other periphals a phone may use.

Readers, I must ask you to validate me now:

1) Am I truly retarded? Did you know this and did I just forget to read a manual?
2) Can I ever go to work again?
3) Just tell me it will be ok? Please????

Dear goodness. The SHAME.... Ahhhhhh... It's only Tuesday.


Mr. Le said...

As long as you didn't supply any identifiers, such as: "My name is Priya and I think this company sucks the fatty," "I would TOTALLY do 420 right now; who would agree with Priya?" "Why do we have these pointless joint conference calls; Priya is getting mad!"... then I think you're just smoking something about being embarrassed.

I don't know why I'm being all dazed and confused with my comments today. Sorry for being blunt.

Capt. BS said...

That bites. It sounds like the Mute function only applies to the on-board microphone, which is not at all how I'd expect it to work... you'd think it would be a software control, no?

Then again, if I recall correctly, your phones are manufactured by Motorola and Research in Motion, both of whom are infamously craptacular user-interface/experience engineers. So I wouldn't be surprised if they decided for you that Bluetooth devices should magically override onboard hardware and never tell you about it.

As for how to deal with the organizatio-polical ramifications, I would make an analogy to the situation where someone receives a company-wide email and, in their efforts to pen a smart-ass reply and/or inform the sender that they are a dumbass, accidentally hits "Reply All" instead of "Reply". Mortifying, right? Well, it is, but only if you assume that everyone else on the distribution list found this yet-another-company-wide-email-blast (the fourth they had received that day, by the way) so enthralling that they felt compelled to meticulously parse and analyze any follow-up message that hit their inbox. In reality, most people find the initial message so unapplicable to their lives that they make a mental note that any follow-up must be even less relevant, and therefore gloss over (or flat-out delete) any reply. (This very thing happened at my first job, and of the five people on my team, only one actually noticed what had happened.)

If you want to be absolutely safe, bring a unicycle to work tomorrow and make a point of riding it into as many cubes/offices as possible. Voila! You are know most widely known as Priya the Ubiquitous Unicyclist. Releasing a viral iPhone/iPad app depicting yourself on said unicycle may help bolster this new persona.

Kate said...

What did you say/do/do in the bathroom that you wouldn't have?

Priya said...

In answer to your questions:

Mr. Le: It turns out no one knew it was me, not even the guys who work for me. The 2 people I told kept my secret safe (for now).

Capt. BS: I took your advice but instead of a unicycle I piled so much work on my team that they couldn't barely blink to remember the happenings of yesterday.

Kate: I flushed a toilet in the bathroom but SOMEHOW had the presence of mind to take the headset off when I went into the stall and leave it on the counter, so no actual other sounds were heard.

Last, I double checked the headset manual and sure enough, no Mute function.